Did you know that anger can help us?
Anger can be positive or negative. Help kids put their anger in the right place and make it useful.
What is anger?
Anger is a feeling or an emotion. People express anger because it is an emotional reaction to certain kinds of stress. Anger is automatic for some people since they have not learned to control it. Anger is different from aggression.
Anger has positive and negative effects. It can be used for good or bad. When we become angry we can lose our patience and act without thinking. This is when anger has a negative effect. Anger can be good or positive when it gives us strength, determination, or even satisfaction when we are faced with difficult situations.
The goal of expressing anger is to minimize the negative effects and maximize the positive effects.
The Positive Functions of Anger
Anger can be positive in four ways. It is an energizer, helps us express ourselves, signals us, and helps us take charge.
First, anger is an energizer in a difficult situation. It gives us strength and mobilizes the body’s resources for self-defense. It provides stamina when a job gets difficult. It enables us to deal with conflict by supplying fuel for the fight.
Second, anger helps us to express ourselves. It releases our tensions and helps us to communicate our negative feelings to others. Sometimes this stays bottled up inside us until we get angry. A healthy expression of our anger is an important way to resolve conflict.
A third way anger has a positive effect is when it signals us. Our anger can give us information about other people and situations. This is just the way our feelings work. Anger, just like other feelings, lets us know here is something unjust, frustrating, threatening, or annoying going on. It can tell us it is time to cope with stress.
Helping us to take charge is a fourth way anger can be positive. It creates a sense of being in charge of a situation. When a situation is getting out of control, anger enables us to take control and assert our interest.
Negative Functions of Anger
There are four basic negative functions of anger. Anger can disrupt out thoughts, cause us to be defensive, lead to aggression, or be a false front.
First of all, anger can hurt us when it disrupts our thoughts and actions. It becomes harder to think clearly. Anger makes it harder for us to pay attention in class or remember things. It becomes difficult to think of the options or choices we have when we face problems. Then we act more on impulse without considering the consequences of our behavior.
Secondly, anger is negative when it is used as a defense. Sometimes we use anger to defend ourselves when it is not necessary. When we are hurt or embarrassed we get angry to protect our pride. It is easier to be angry than to be anxious. We sometimes get angry to keep from feeling hurt.
A third negative effect of anger is that it can lead to aggression. When we become upset, we sometimes try to release our feelings through our behavior. We get angry and try to take it out on something or someone.
Fourth, anger can be a false front. Becoming angry is sometimes a way to promote an impression of ourselves to others. At times we show our anger because we want others to see us in a certain way. Demonstrating anger becomes a way to build a particular kind of reputation. Then, people will learn to expect you to reach a certain level with them until you do get angry.
Name four ways anger can be positive.
Name four ways anger can be negative.
Join the mailing list at counselorgames.com and be a part of the Counselor Tribe. I am putting the finishing touches on a new book Play Therapy for Schools. Help me with feedback and what works and what needs improvement. The Counselor Tribe will get a free copy of the book. Join the Counselor Tribe today! counselorgames.com
Anger control and management workbook for your students, and adults love it too! This workbook has been used by professional companies such as realtors, teachers, administrators, foster care, probation officers and agency counselors, not to mention used by school counselors in three different countries. Anger and Me is reproducible, so you can make as many copies as you need. I like to give it to parents, two to three copies at a time, and ask them to use the book together at home. Do two to three pages a day together. It helps to open new levels of communication at home.